A new divide I created within, to make sense of the infinite futility that lies inside…

How to Have a Small yet Awesome BBQ in Badulla

  • Buy small portable BBQ grill from Cargills
  • Buy sausages, bread, chili sauce, drinks and charcoal
  • Steal a butter knife from the hotel you are staying in
  • Get kerosene oil to light the fire
  • Park vehicle on a dark hairpin bend in Badulla, preferably with a beer pub nearby
  • Get beer
  • Go to a corner of the hairpin bend and set up the grill
  • Open up the hood of the vehicle and keep sausages on the engine to defrost
  • Get the iPod dock and put on some good music
  • Start the fire
  • Watch it burn and grin to yourself
  • Let two of your friends do the dirty work of BBQing and have a chat with the rest while you wait for the food to be ready
  • Spread chili sauce on a slice of bread, put sausages and make a sandwich
  • Eat it
  • Dance on the road while waiting for more food, but make sure to move away when you see an oncoming vehicle
  • Stop caring about the slight drizzle that started to fall
  • Feel good about life
  • Get high on the moment
  • Stare back at the people passing you and staring at you as if you came from another world
  • Eat all the sausages, including the ones you accidently dropped on the ground
  • Forget to get tissue, so use the leaves on trees or a hanky or even your own t-shirt to wipe your hands
  • If leaves don’t do the job / you don’t have a hanky / don’t want to mess up your t-shirt, covertly use the back of your friend’s t-shirt to wipe your hands
  • Smile at him as if nothing’s wrong
  • Talk about what a good investment the portable grill was
  • After all is done, clean everything and pack up to leave
  • Forget to take the BBQ grill which is a good investment and leave it on the road side
  • Remember that you left it behind when you come to Arugam Bay the next day and prepare to have a BBQ

7 responses

  1. Babe, THAT *points above* was HILARIOUS!

    April 19, 2009 at 5:13 pm

  2. Pingback: How to Have a Small Yet Awesome BBQ in Badulla | Dance

  3. hahaha that was really good!! I love the part about wiping your hands on the friends tee (that happens a lot near a school tuck shop I tell you!) and going to arugam bay without the BBQ grill! 😀

    April 19, 2009 at 6:50 pm

  4. That made me grin like an idiot! =D

    No, I don’t always grin like an idiot!

    April 19, 2009 at 6:53 pm

  5. ROFL! So THAT’s the grill I saw on the side of the road… 🙂

    April 19, 2009 at 7:00 pm

  6. Hilarious. HIGH-LARIOUS too! Glad you had an awesome. I I found the friends T thing bloody brilliant.

    Huge hugs man 🙂

    April 19, 2009 at 10:11 pm

  7. Heh he. Good one. I can only imagine. Reminds me of the J’s and drinks we had in Ratnapura in the middle of the night in that big-fat stretch of the road…

    April 23, 2009 at 11:07 am

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